The pants dilemma

Like just about everybody I know I hate buying pants. There is nothing that makes you feel like a freak and hate your body quite like walking into a mall and trying to find a comfortable pair of jeans. A couple of years ago I tried on a pair of jeans at Old Navy and found that they fit me like a glove. I’ve been ordering them online ever since. It’s the perfect system. I don’t have to try anything on. They’re cheap and soft — none of this stiff expensive jean stuff. I don’t even have to go to the mall.

Sadly, it seems Old Navy no longer makes them. My current batch have been dying left right and centre. I need more before I leave for grad school. It’s not an urgent need give the summer weather but I need to do it now. Every time I check online the style I like is only available in 0 and 18. I think they are killing it. (As a side note I love that Old Navy actually sells plus size clothes that are affordable and stylish and in the same place as the other clothes. They get three and a half gold stars.)

My system has died and now I have to go try on new pants. And hate myself. And feel frustrated. It has been pointed out to me that I should spend less time whining about it and more time finding new pants. Or even trying on one of the many other styles sold by Old Navy. I just don’t want to. All good things must come to an end and so have my perfectly fitting pants.

This afternoon I will suck it up and deal with it. If I feel really down I can go mope over some Yogen Fruz.

Then there are the other perfect pants. It took me over a year to find them but they are perfect. In every way. Except that they only come in one colour.

Before leaving for my trip last spring I wanted to find some nice hiking pants. Ones that weren’t super frumpy or terrible. I did not succeed. Everything was horrible and unstylish. I am at least thirty years too young for any of them. I wondered why I couldn’t find any hiking pants with a skinny jean cut. There are the “straight legged” ones that flare like it’s the early 2000s. Then there are pants that are basically tights. I would never feel comfortable doing a hardcore hike or living my everyday life in those.

Then while I was in Seattle I found the pants. Finally. They only came in one colour and you can’t get them in Canada as far as I can tell but they were perfect. They fit so comfortably. They repel water — in my life that is one of the most important qualities a garment can have. Once I was hanging out with a friend who was wearing jeans. We sat on a bench without realizing it was still wet from an earlier rain storm. I was dry within ten minutes. They are magic. The material is also super comfortable and light weight. If they made these pants in ten colours I would buy them all. For now I have to make do with one.


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