O-Fence

When I was little there were some words that didn’t make that much sense to me. Instead I made up my own meanings and applications like you do when you mishear song lyrics. I thought that Wales was a country shaped like a whale where people had funny accents. I was confused by the whole Dutch, Holland, Netherlands thing and thought they were three separate countries. The Netherlands is also called something completely unrelated in French, which I thought was a fourth country. For a lot time I confused the words pedestrian and presbyterian. After learning the difference I wondered if there was a special word for presbyterians who were crossing the street.

For several years we had seasons tickets to the Calgary Stampeders games that my dad got through work. They were fun to go to and affordable. For the most part I understood what was going on. Sports make sense to me. One ritual I never got was the point in the game where they held up a sign with an O or a D on it and another sign with a railroad track on it. People would alternately yell O or D followed by fence. Somehow they knew what to do with these confusing signs.

For the life of me I couldn’t figure out what was up with the railway tracks. They had nothing to do with football and didn’t really look like a fence. If you’re going to hold up a sign with a fence on it have it look like a fence. I also didn’t connect the o-fence and d-fence with the action on the field and who we were supposed to be cheering on. It wasn’t until I was older that it made any sense. I probably should’ve asked my dad. Instead I did that thing where you pretend you know what’s happening because everybody else seems to have it figured out. It’s like a joke that’s not funny but everyone is laughing at.

I say this because the Canadian women’s soccer team play their last group game tonight. For the most part the tournament could use a lot more o-fence. I want them to score one good goal. Preferably off a nice cross into the box, something they haven’t been able to do yet. I will have my o and picket fence ready.

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